I would like to find the person responsible for the invention of homework and have words!
I have a list of people that I hold responsible for making my life harder, those include the bright sparks who thought up the idea of a six week summer holiday, school uniform and teenagers. But my biggest issue is with homework.
I realise I am in the minority here, and probably appear lazy, uninterested or just generally the kind of parent who just can’t be arsed, but in my defence the fact is their homework becomes your homework.
I’m obviously not talking secondary, I mean primary, the age where they come out of school like little balls of moody energy, always hungry (doesn’t matter what you bring the snacks always wrong) and the first thing they ask is can they go to the park with their friends, that’s if they haven’t got one of the five thousand after school activities that are available nowadays, which if you do not do at least three per week, ( including a language and swimming) you are failing in the extra curricular parenting department. So fitting in the homework takes on a whole new level. When do other parents manage to fit it in? I am definitely missing a trick here, I thought there were only 24 hours in a day. Maybe they should run parenting time management courses along side the maths workshops.
Fridays which I used to love have now become a minefield of tears, tension and tantrums and that’s just me. Put the kids in the mix and your lucky if we are talking by Wednesday. I wonder if more couples file for divorce on a Friday night( once they read that dreaded worksheet and try to tackle the 15 spellings that then need to be put into sentences) than any other night of the week. Perhaps “divorce lawyers for you” go viral every Friday. What happened to a takeaway and a film? In our house it’s algebra, a power point and a book review.
It doesn’t help that its like pulling teeth with my kids. By the time we have negotiated when we are going to fit homework into their already packed schedule of playing on the computer or watching T.V they are tired and moody ,plus they haven’t eaten because you have been so busy arguing the toss about the homework that you haven’t had time to bloody cook.
So you both sit down, tired, grumpy and starving to start the whole process which ,we were advised by the class teacher should take no longer than 30 minutes. Yet why do I find myself one hour later offering them all the chocolate available to man if they will just write “distribution” in a sentence. All the huffing, puffing and crossing out is enough to give you an aneurysm. Is it this hard at school? No wonder the teachers send this stuff home, if its that bloody hard in class its a wonder they learn anything. If it takes all night to write 15 words they have no chance trying to cover the curriculum in six hours.
Then there’s their attitude, I’m not the bad guy here people, this isn’t my idea of a quiet night in, blame the government ! “How does writing distribution in a sentence help me anyway?” one of my little darlings asked me the other night during our customary battle. That is a very good question I thought, it’s a mystery to me. I know spelling is important (but we do have spellchecker) and I know that statistically children whose parents are more involved in their learning perform better at school. But, can’t we invent some other way of helping them?……After spellings its times tables which means more sulking, then the reading adds another twenty minutes to an already action packed academic night.
So fractious, exhausted and hungry we finish the evening hating each other, the husband and I are on the verge of separation and to top it all off they still spelt “distribution” wrong.
I rest my case.